2. Changes in appetite and fluid intake
Towards the end of life, the desire for food and water decreases. Your parent may:
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refuses food and drink;
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swallows more difficultly and more slowly;
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has dry lips, even if you offer water.
The body no longer needs “fuel” like it used to, and forcing yourself with food causes discomfort, not comfort .
How to help
• Offer sips of water or ice cubes if they want.
• Maintain lips with balm.
• Let them decide how much to take – it’s a natural process, not a battle.
3. Altered respiratory rhythm
In recent days, breathing often changes:
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long pauses appear (so-called Cheyne-Stokes breathing);
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“Wheezing” or “groaning” sounds are heard (known as the “death rattle”);
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breathing becomes shallow, irregular, or labored.
The cause is slowed blood circulation and fluid retention in the lungs and throat.
How to help
• Slightly elevate the head to make breathing easier.
• Use a cool mist humidifier or fan for fresher air.
• Speak soothingly – even without a response.
This usually does not mean pain, although it may seem alarming.
4. Confusion, disorientation, or hallucinations
A drop in oxygen to the brain can lead to:
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mixing up names and events;
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“seeing” people who are not there;
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a feeling of being somewhere else.
Some describe this as a “transition” – a shift from reality to an inner world.
How to help
• Reassure gently.
• Don’t correct perceptions unless they are worried.
• Be there and offer support – even if they don’t recognize you.
The most important thing is the feeling of security and love .
